We continue on our journey into honest kisses, a follow though of a blog recently called Kissing honestly – a Kingdom of God reality, I trust you enjoy
A kiss expresses love.
If I love someone, I will tell them the truth.
Love “rejoices with the truth.” When my wife leans over to me and whispers, “You need a mint,” I do not take offence. I get a mint. She has acted out of love; she has shown that she cares. When some one passes by and say that was out of book, unkind, angry or what ever quietly, remember it is out of love.
Even when it hurts, honesty is the loving approach. In his letter to the Galatians, the Apostle Paul’s honesty is blunt and courageous. He refers to the Galatians as foolish (3:1 ), but he also uses terms of familial endearment: brothers (3:15 , 4:28 ), my dear children (4:19 ).
Paul’s honesty flowed from his love for these Christians.
My dear children, for whom I am again in the pains of childbirth until Christ is formed in you, how I wish I could be with you now and change my tone, because I am perplexed about you!
“Perfect love drives out fear” (1 Jn. 4:18 ). When we choose love over our fear of disapproval or rejection, we cast a vote favouring intimacy and opposing shallow relationships. Bob responded graciously to my honesty and began to take appropriate action. Our friendship grew and deepened. If I ever need a wake-up call, I hope that he will risk honesty for me. That’s what love does.
A kiss shows value.
One of the reasons we are prone to lies or even not taking on the truth, is that we want to protect the self-image and egos of the people in our care. We abdicate the truth-telling to someone who is not so close, not so intimately responsible, not so bound up in the future of our loved one—let him say what needs to be said.
But should the truth come from someone who doesn’t give a whit? No, it shouldn’t.
The person we kiss is a person who is precious to us.
When we choose to tell the truth, we communicate how much we value that person.
We don’t want to hurt them, but it would hurt more if they were to progress down a path of denial and pain.
We will rescue what we value when we are honest. That’s why Prov. 27:6 says, “Wounds from a friend can be trusted.”
When we value a person, we will risk the truth.
Truth is coming….
This doesn’t mean we rush into who cares ways of telling the truth, we look at each person and situation and make a decision on how to approach it. Through life’s experience we take note and learn the art program of “speaking the truth in love” (Eph. 4:15 ), care is needed.
An effective kiss needs to be gentle.
Honour is not bestowed by a rough, painful kiss. A kiss needs to be appropriate. An ill-timed, embarrassing kiss does not communicate love. And a kiss needs to be nestled in trust. An atmosphere of trust must be fostered before a kiss confers value. The same three guidelines apply to honesty. Which we will look at next time
Next time along with this let us look at the Art of Honesty…